Your Spiritual Practice Shouldn’t Feel Like a Chore. Here’s What to Do Instead.
Why most seekers try too hard—and how three breaths with a tree can teach you what rituals can’t
If your spiritual practice feels like checking boxes, such as reciting the right words, following the correct steps, or sitting in the proper position which is how many of us were taught, then you’re not alone.
Let me break the news to you—you are likely doing it wrong.
You’ve just been taught that spiritual practice requires elaborate rituals, perfect technique, and doing things the “right” way.
Here’s what I learned after years of trying too hard: sometimes the ritual gets in the way.
When Structure Becomes a Barrier
Three years ago, while formally studying and experiencing ecospirituality, I kept trying to figure out what made it different from simply spending time in nature or performing nature-appreciation rituals.
I thought I needed structure. A process. The right words to say when approaching a tree or sitting in a forest.
So I created rituals. Good ones, even. With intention, meaning, and all the qualities that spiritual practice is supposed to have. Hey, I did as I was taught way back in the day. Spiritual practice and prayer needed this, right?
But something felt off.
The words and actions, no matter how well-crafted, kept me at a distance from the natural world. The ritual became a performance I had to get right, rather than a doorway into actual connection.
I was doing everything correctly, but nothing was really working.
What I Discovered Through Sit Spots
Eventually, I let go of the structure and tried something simpler, which is what my guides at the time were trying to communicate: just sit with nature. Listen. Drop the agenda. Drop the script.
Just, listen.
What surprised me was how nature communicates at a completely different pace than I expected.
I had to slow down. Way down. Slower than I thought “counted” as practice. How could this be right when everything I previously had been taught actually needed to be undone?
In that slowing, something shifted. Not because I was doing it right. But because I stopped trying to do it at all.
I was just . . . there, with the tree, breathing.
Why Spiritual Seekers Overcomplicate Things
We’ve been conditioned to believe we need rituals and processes that work for others.
Sometimes those can help us get started, like training wheels on a bike.
But ultimately, we need to develop our own direct connection. Which can feel scary the first time because we’ve been taught there’s a “right” way to do things, and this isn’t it!
What if you mess it up? What if nothing happens? What if you’re doing it wrong?
Here’s the truth: there is no wrong.
The tree doesn’t care if you use the perfect words. Your body doesn’t need you to sit in lotus position. The more-than-human world isn’t grading your technique.
Three Breaths Is Enough
This is why the three-breath practice works when elaborate meditation routines feel stale:
It’s not about sitting still. You don’t have to silence your mind or achieve some peaceful state. You can have racing thoughts. You can be distracted. You can feel restless.
It’s about relationship. You’re not meditating at a tree. You’re breathing with a tree. There’s a difference. One is performance. The other is presence.
It works with your body, not against it. This is embodied meditation—the kind where movement, sensation, and breath are part of the practice, not obstacles to overcome. This is something I learned through my work with the Spiritual Paths Institute on Spiritual Styles: meditation doesn’t have to look like what we’ve been told it should look like.
It’s immediate. You don’t need 20 minutes, a quiet room, or perfect conditions. You need 30 seconds and a tree. That’s it.
The Practice (In Case You Missed It)
Find a tree. Any tree.
Stand close enough to feel its presence.
Take three breaths together:
First breath: Notice the tree
Second breath: Notice yourself
Third breath: Notice what’s between you
That’s the entire practice.
No words required. No ritual. No right or wrong way.
Just you, the tree, and three breaths.
What Happens When You Stop Trying So Hard
When I let go of needing to do it right, something opened. Not every time. Not in some dramatic, lightning-bolt way.
But often enough that I kept coming back. And in that returning—without agenda, without performance, without trying to get it right—I found what all the elaborate rituals couldn’t give me:
Actual connection.
Direct relationship.
Presence that arose naturally instead of being forced.
Your spiritual practice doesn’t have to feel like work. It doesn’t have to require perfect technique or elaborate rituals or doing things the way someone else told you to.
Sometimes the simplest practices, three breaths with a tree, teach us what years of trying too hard never could:
Presence isn’t something we achieve. It’s something we allow.
What would shift if you let your practice be this simple?
I’d love to hear in the comments.
🌿 Thank you for reading Where Insight Meets Earth. If your spiritual practice has felt stale or performative, forward this to someone who might need permission to try something simpler.
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